West Final

Heres a gonzo reporting of the 2006 Western Final as seen through my eyes:
3:00 pm- Ok why is CBC showing the end of a game no one cares about and not the Rider game? Gotta schedule these playoff games better. What happened to Toronto, they didnt show up until it was too late. Congrats Montreal
3:15 ish- Effing Riders....big return first play
3:25 ish- McCallum puts BC up by 3....and trash talks...you're a kicker Paul...settle
3:40 First turn over...good work D
3:44 Two consecutive time counts?!?!?!? WTF....Luca is good to tie it at 3...Although Kerry is looking as mobile as he had been all year
3:47 Dave Dickenson runs for 26 yards. WTF...only Danny Mac would have been more shameful
3:48 Dickenson eludes the entire rider D line in the backfield, and runs for 7 yards to end the first quarter.....when did Dickenson turn into Tracy Ham? Newsflash, he didn't! Eff off you guys, hes old and slow you gotta hit him in the backfield
3:50 I don't know why the announcers always, and I mean always, have to talk about how effing wonderful BC is.... Buono must give Walby the best tuna sandwiches hes ever had
3:52 Dickenson looks kinda like a child molester with his scraggly beard. The riders couldn't tackle the pick up team from the Santa Maria senior citizens complex...Although if they can stay within striking distance they're still alive. BC is first and 10 inside the 15....hold 'em to three boys come on! Forces Dickenson to throw it away.
3:55 2nd and long....huge play coming up.....TD! For eff's sakes...Beautiful catch. God I hate BC. Logistically the Riders can't afford to give up more than 7 more points this half, and need to score effing soon 10-3 BC (assuming McCallum hits the convert)
3:57 Yup
3:58 Bathroom break, and gotta get a glass of iced tea
4:00 Riders get the ball....enough sh*tting the bed. Why is BC allowed to use the scoreboard and a guy with a megaphone to rile up the crowd? I was at a Rider game when the Riders got a 10 yard penalty for the pep band...clear systemic bias.
4:02 Two and out, lost 20 yards. God.
4:04 Congi gives up the safety 12-3 BC....The D needs to show up and fast. And the O better be right behind them.
4:06 Why can't we kick the ball past the effing 50 yard line!
4:08 BC marching...gotta tackle you idiots!
4:10 Reports coming in from Regina the House says: "Well we lost already, might as well change the channel" Rider nation as optimistic as ever
4:12 Riders make a tackle by the first man! wow! 2nd and long....biggest play of the game so far coming up
4:13 First down BC (what else)
4:14 TD BC 19-3...its now or never to show up boys
4:19 BC is a good team, but they are not this good...its the classisc pattern of the Riders not showing up in the biggest games... 35 passing yards to this point. It may be time for Marcus Crandell....DON'T PUNT ON 3RD AND 1!!!!!! YOU'RE DOWN BY 16 AND DOING NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Besides Congi punts like a 12 year old, and follows through with a crappy punt. Perfect.
4:22 Riders D forces the 2 and out. Momentum shift? Its up to the returners to get a positive return and the O to make something happen. This should be Kerry's last chance, another 2 and out and he needs to ride the pine.
4:25 Or we can fumble the ball and give it up. Pure effing riders.
4:27 Update from Regina e-dot says: "This is F_cking pathetic!". I am inclined to agree.
4:30 D holds 'em to 3, 22-3 BC....this is borderline unsalvagable. Something needs to happen STAT. A score at the end of the half would be huge, even a FG. The fact that BC is only up by 19 after dominating so hard is pretty amazing.
4:32 Or...no first downs...3rd and short (2 or 3), clearly punting, watch BC score again. Especially after yet another CRAPPY PUNT!!!!!!!!! My God!
4:34 2nd and long BC, gotta hold 'em here
4:35 Or they can jump offside and still give up a first down play. wow I have never seen such crap on a platter before
4:36 The Rider tackling is actually worse than when I made the crack about the senior citizens
4:37 Dickenson deep...TD BC. I called it. Update from Regina...Eric Tillman is on the phone to Kent Austin as we speak. Also Eric Tillman looks more like a troll doll than ever...really....google him, it's hilarous.
4:40 14 seconds left in the half, nothing can happen, even the announcers are calling for Crandell, Joseph 3/7 for 34, beyond pathetic.
4:41 Dominguez catches the ball on the 20, and gets out of bounds, Congi lines up a FG.....and a challenge. Eff off Buono.
4:45 Catch upheld. Screw you, let us have 3 points.
4:46 Congi.....22 yards.....its up.....no good! Single point. 29-4 BC. Half Time. I need a drink. On the half time interview Wally Buno is a dink. Barett is on the phone to Hamilton for a job.
4:48 Chose iced tea, hold the rye, to drink...alcohol doesn't solve problems. Thus concludes the one government mandated learning point per rider rant. Thank you very much Lorne Calvert.
4:51 Shaun Millington is the worst commentator in the history of televised sports. As if there isn't another former CFL player who has better speaking skills than Millington. Frers makes a good point. how come Kenton Keith has 3 touches? This guy is our offence. God.
4:58 Update from Regina....Dad says "it's pretty ugly no it's really really ugly". My dad gets the award for understatement of the year.
5:00 Ad for Casino Royale....still not too sure about a blonde James Bond
5:01 Danny Barett says "He will start the half" re: Kerry Joseph. Time of possession 21 minutes to 9 minutes for BC. Pure domination
5:02 Dorsey with a decent return, first down Riders on the 40ish.
5:04 Two and out. Brilliant. This rope-a-dope is really lulling BC to sleep. Also Charles Thomas has got to go.
5:07 BC driving....I can't so this anymore....it's to infuriating.....God....
I'm Out